I decided to swing by the Denver Craigslist page today, since I never got to complete my planned online joke to look for Jenna Finch by posting a Craigslist ad for her specifically (still haven’t put this idea 100% to bed). I cruised on over to the personals section (you might remember I did a few of those - and plan to continue at some point) and clicked on one of the first entries.

Only to realize that the girl looks like an older, slightly more chubby Lyndzie Taylor.

Click on the thumb to make it full size:

Apparently Ms. Older Lyndzie is “very skeptical about this whole craigslist thing,” but deviously posted in Woman Seeking Men instead of Strictly Platonic or Misc. Romance. I say deviously instead of accidentally, because no one does this accidentally.

Well, idiots do, but I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt.

If I learned one thing from my Craigslist experiments, and most dating in general, it’s that you do not mention dating when you want to date someone. That’s saved for a drunken conversation.

Filed under: Colorado, The Web, Craigslist, Lyndzie Taylor | Post a comment

Ok, I jumped the gun on the second wave. I’m sorry, but I got into a diction discussion about some wording in the new ad, and Ryan Max wrote a sentence I really liked, so I ran with it and posted.One response thus far.WANTED: Girlfriend Who Hates All Her Tatoos

It’s no secret that I like girls who have tattoos, but this attraction has been misunderstood until recently.I’ve realized that girls who have tattoos, but absolutely hate them, are far more interesting than those who really think that butterfly on the small of their back is something they would want imprinted on their bodies for life.Do you hate your tattoos? Are they relics of a particular point in your life that your would rather forget? Are you single?If you answered yes to 2 or more of the above and your horrible tattoo is not on your face, the chances that we would get along are good.Probably better than your tattoo.Your tattoo need not be sexy or vulgar, or even of any particular aesthetic value, so long as you would squander a trip in a time machine to erase it from your flesh rather than, say, preventing the Holocaust or warning the Native Americans that the white man brings only death.I have three tattoos, none of them large, one of which I hate.Perhaps we should discuss our other commonalities.

Some of you might be saying: “Dave, what tattoo do you hate?” To you I say, I am not a huge fucking fan of the SAW movies…

Next Week, or whenever I lose patience: WANTED: Hippie Girlfriend.And let’s just say that ad is much more specific as to what I tolerate when it comes to attractive hippies.

Filed under: Craigslist Personals, Craigslist, Personals, Tattoos | 2 Comments

I have written a series of personal ads I will be putting up on Craigslist occasionally.Last night, Nate and I were talking about how mimes are pretty impressive. Today, I wrote a quick post asking for a mime girlfriend and received two responses within 20 minutes.So, I figure I might as well pursue this avenue in my spare time.This week: WANTED: Mime Girlfriend.

It occurred to me last night that I have great respect for mimes that take their craft seriously. It’s a difficult skill and one that interests me.I’m not looking for a woman who does mime, or a woman who is studying mime, but for a woman that is a mime (and preferably attractive).I have nothing in common with a mime. I’m pretty good at talking and move naturally – as opposed to gracefully, but seeing a mime interests me.This is not a sexual fetish, as a matter of fact, I’d like to keep the mime out of the bedroom. I’m a writer, and I’m not going to write you to climax any more than I expect you to mime me off.I think that dating a mime is finally an experience I’m ready for. I’ve dated engineers, actresses, those that claimed they were lesbians and semi-professional nomads, but never a mime.I’d like to try that.If you are a mime, drop me a line. You don’t have to date me yourself, but I’m in dire need of mime contacts if I’m going to meet the mime of my dreams.

These are sincere in the sense that they are personal ads for me. They are certainly my sense of humor, and I might as well respond to those who too the time to respond to me.Maybe even meet them.This is worth exploring.Next time - WANTED: Girlfriend Who Hates All Her Tattoos

Filed under: Craigslist Personals, Craigslist, Mimes, Personals | 2 Comments