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Dos Factotum » Archive » Episode 805: Clever But Poor
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March 25th, 2009

Episode 805: Clever But Poor

We get a lot of fanmail. Most of it’s from female prisoners looking to hook up with us once they’re “out of the circus.” But some fans are more curious about the artistic process and ask about stuff like what influences David’s drawings. This post goes out to them.

Landlord Tad’s left arm, the one that’s always outstretched and ready to receive money, was modeled off a stripper’s arm, believe it or not.

One sad night, many moons ago, David, our friend Nate and myself ventured way east on Metropolitan Ave. to Northwest Brooklyn’s only gentleman’s club, Pumps. Pumps is a sad place. They don’t charge a cover, and for good reason: many of the the dancers are old and flabby and not too happy to be working at Pumps; the lap dances take place behind a see-through sheet that’s located about three feet from the stage; one of the regulars there is a sexually aggressive gay man who works as a producer at Court TV and who likes asking 20-something straight men if they have coke and, even if they don’t, if they’d like to party later at his place and, even if they don’t want to party later, if they’d take his Amex card for a while and spend his money on anything they want. (He was especially interested in partying with David.)

One stripper, the oldest one, would shake her thin breasts in our faces for five seconds and then stop dancing and hold out her hand, palm up. She’d look at us like a Key Food cashier who had just rung up our groceries and was now waiting to get money. We all gave this stripper money. Out of the entire Pumps staff, she was by far the most burned out and probably had the saddest stories.

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