You dumb, Hispanic bastard. Whether or not your post about sleeping with my girlfriend is true is beside the point. It needs to be edited like a sick kitten needs its medicine. You’d think a man who earns his Fritos/chewing tobacco money by writing would know how to punctuate. Here it is, after a brief scrubbing:

I know you are posting the new comic right now, Ryan, and it’s a really funny one. What I have to tell you is less funny: Your girlfriend and I have fornicated. So many times, but mostly while you were in search of various types of food rather than living up to your boyfriendly responsibilities.

I have a lot of things going for me. For one, I’m skinny. Even certain movie zombies look more “put-together” than I do. Women love skinny men. I’m Hispanic; women seem to love that, too. I’m sure there are other qualities I’m missing (do bloggers historically get more tail than non-bloggers?).

I decided to let you know now that you’ve filed a libel suit against me. How’s this for libel, buddy: I boinked your girlfriend! I also managed not to cry while orgasming, which, if you’ll remember, is a big step for me. -Dave-

Good news, David: The Learning Annex class schedule will accommodate your “I work naked,” new media lifestyle.

Tags: , Learning Annex, moutian mage, Tupac

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